That's one of the things I was told when I was in law school. I had two of my three kids while in law school, and the school I went to was not very happy at the sight.
I was pregnant throughout my first year (my son was born in June after finals). At the time, the profs were mostly tolerant of it, even though some frowned or scowled when I would take an extra millisecond to rise to present a case. My favorite story was about presenting a case in Contracts when I was eight months pregnant. The professor was a male chauvinist pig who had spent most of the year explaining why women did this and men did that. Most of the class was angry that he made me stand up when I was so obviously with child.
The prof paced back and forth, pontificating and pointedly ignoring the fact that standing could be uncomfortable (it didn't bother me, but it certainly bothered the other students). This went on for about 10 minutes or so until the baby wriggled visibly under my shirt. At that point, the professor lost his place, stammered, and then told me I could sit down. It was one of the more amusing times that first year.
My second child was born during Christmas break during my second year (my youngest kiddoes are 18 months apart). By that point, the administration wasn't nearly as amused. During conversations with various professors, I was told that of course my grades were much lower when I was pregnant than afterward (even though my work didn't seem any different to me). Unbeknownst to me, I couldn't concentrate as much when I was big as a house. And oddly, once the offending bundle under the shirt was born, he/she wasn't more distracting the way I thought; he/she was less so. I guess I just didn't notice these things. I did notice when one of my profs called me a "baby factory" in front of other administration officials. And I noticed how I was pointedly not informed about internships, scholarships, etc. like other 2Ls and 3Ls.
My friends were furious at the obvious sexism, but I had come to expect that from the school. By the time my daughter was born, I'd dealt with enough snide comments, jokes, and snubs to realize that having children in law school is frowned upon.
That's why I was a bit amused when I read this article at law.com on the rising trend of students having children during law school.
Catherine Tornabene watches her 2-year-old son bop around to salsa-flavored songs every Wednesday afternoon in a Spanish class for moms and tots. It's some of the best hours in the University of California, Hastings College of the Law student's busy schedule. As she watches Nathaniel laugh and play, she's acutely aware that she won't always have the opportunity.
"A huge advantage of law school is that your time flexibility is just incredible," Tornabene, who is in her third year, said. "I only have classes two days a week. You can take off a lot of time. You don't have clients relying on you."
Tornabene, 33, knew she didn't want Nathaniel's birth to coincide with first-year exams, but she and her husband wanted their first child to be born while she was still in school. Once she starts working at Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom next year, these Wednesday afternoons with Nathaniel probably won't be possible.
Tornabene's planning isn't an exception -- law school administrators and students say such careful logic is apparently driving a parent boom among student ranks. University of California, Berkeley's Boalt Hall School of Law's dean of students, Victoria Ortiz, said the school doesn't keep statistics, but her staff has been buzzing about the phenomenon.
The buzz, of course, is that law students, like younger people everywhere these days, are more concerned with quality-of-life issues than their baby boomer counterparts were. In short, they really do want to have it all and they expect the corporate world to bow to their expectations.
Professors and administrators understand that students juggle all sorts of responsibilities apart from schoolwork, she said, including part-time jobs and internships -- and kids.
That type of understanding seems to be rare at firms, Alon said. Attorneys who come to campus to speak with students do well answering questions about the best places to clerk to ensure a spot with their firm, but they falter on questions about how their 5-year-old feels about their 90-hour work weeks.
"They're very surprised to hear questions from students about work-life balance," Alon said, adding that the advice she gets frequently is to "work really hard and pay your nanny really well."
What working attorneys and firm managers are just beginning to understand is that there is a generation entering the profession who don't plan to pay someone else to watch their children.
By the time my second child was born, I knew I didn't want to spend 100 hours a week at the office and miss my children growing up. My oldest had been in daycare at eight weeks old, and I had begun realizing how much I had missed by doing that. I'm very proud of my J.D., and the fact that I got it under such adverse circumstances that most people wouldn't be able to do it. But I'm more proud of my three kidlets and that my husband and I made a decision that someone being here for them was more important than the extra stuff my paycheck could have bought.
My suspicion is that these newly minted corporate lawyers will decide within five years that they would rather go solo and set their own schedules rather than have their inability to come on the petting zoo field trip be a lifelong issue to their children. Or they'll leave the field all together, which is what I decided to do. In the long run, it's your kids who will care about you priorities more than clients.
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